How I feel about myself…

How do you become your biggest fan? How do you convince yourself that you deserve what you work hard for and that you can do everything?

Sometimes it’s hard for me to think like this. Somedays I feel like I can do everything and somedays I feel like I deserve to feel bad about myself. Lately, though, I’ve been having a rough time with self-esteem. I feel like everything I do has no positive impact, whatsoever.

Honestly, I’m not sure where this is coming from. It may just be from being burned out. I’ve pushed myself for so long that I’ve forgotten how to step back and enjoy myself. I’ve forgotten how to relax and keep going for my goals. Instead, I’m focusing on things that really aren’t important.

I’m realizing now that this is going to get me nowhere. Doubting myself is useless. It does nothing but set me back. I need to remember that I can do everything.

Maybe I need to remind myself of some of the things that I’m proud of…I guess there is no better place than here.

I’ve been playing around and telling Carlos about how strong my arms are getting, but honestly, I’m super proud of how much muscle I’ve gained in them. And I mean, super proud. I even made Mario feel my muscles. 😬🤦‍♀️

I’m able to lift heavier things.

My feet feel so much better even when walking long distances.

I have as lot more stamina.

My movements are better, cleaner, and faster. At least that’s how they feel to me.

My pants are too big but I can’t buy the next size yet because I’m not there yet.

My squat is so much better.

I need to remind myself of these things but my brain sometimes gets clogged with all the ugliness and sabotaging ways that I forget.

I need to remember that I can do everything.

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