The post that gets published…

Over the last few months I’ve had a few posts written but I just didn’t feel like they were necessary to put up. They were more like writing exercises that I needed to do in order to really be able to process different things that were happening and even moments to allow myself to even be able to clear up the muddy waters that my brain had become.

I’m back, though. I’ve said it before…over and over. The blog does help me. I’ve come to a point where I’m slowly starting to realize just how important believing in yourself is wen it comes to your goals. I feel like all this time that COVID has taken from us has led to my spiraling of negativity when it came to my weight loss journey. I don’t want that to happen anymore.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been really talking to myself about what it is that I need. Not really what I want, but what I need to be happy, healthy, and just overall being a better person. It’s really not an easy answer at first but then, again, it is. It’s having that knowledge of what are some of the things that I can implement in my life that will make me feel good about myself.

You know, there has been this quote that I read the other day I’ve just been thinking about lately.

“You can’t hate yourself into lasting change”

That was crazy. I read it and I was floored. At first, it’s one of those quotes that on the surface feels just pretty self explanatory but you have to dig deep. This quote represents me right now not because I hate myself but because my self-esteem hasn’t been the greatest lately. I don’t always like myself but I think that’s a lot of people. For me, the quote really speaks to me because as I try to change different things about myself, I don’t think that I’ve truly learned how to appreciate those changes and therefore they are harder to keep up. If you aren’t happy with yourself, it’s hard to keep those new habits or that commitment you’ve made to yourself.

When you let yourself be proud of your accomplishments, you will appreciate your hard work. I can’t always say that I was proud of most things I did or do, but I really would like to work on how to become a person who is proud. Someone who doesn’t make an excuse because I’ve accomplished something or downplay it. Always trying to downplay something or make it not seem as “amazing.” I guess part of me feels like I’ve made it hard on myself, so it’s my own fault which leads to the accomplishment to be not as important.

But no more. I’m done constantly feeling like my hard work isn’t enough or something to be proud of. Now again, no one makes me feel like that. It’s just me. It’s how I perceive myself right now.

I’m going to make a commitment to myself to be someone who appreciates the effort and accomplishments of things I am working for. I will no longer be down on myself because I wasn’t able to achieve something. I’ll just work harder and stay focused.

More to come…

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