I have started many posts over the last few days, but I haven’t posted yet. I did feel compelled to share this one, though, partly because it didn’t hurt my brain to write it. All the other posts were a little too ‘real’ to hit publish at the time, but I’ll put them out eventually.
So, I wanted to share something that happened to me recently. It’s not anything monumental but it did get me thinking and even put things into perspective at that moment. I hope I can relay to you the way I felt in *that* moment, so that you can better understand this turning point in my life.
I went shopping the other day. Now, I’ve always hated shopping because when you are an overweight person, shopping becomes a task rather than a good time. It’s just another reminder that you have limitations based on your size. Things that you like may not be available in your size, things that you don’t like are always available in your size, and sometimes you’re not even lucky enough to find the stuff you don’t like. But I digress…
So back to my shopping…Shopping has gotten better for me. I have a better selection since losing some weight and I’m still losing, which is nice. I have, over the last 10 months, gone from a 5xl to a 3xl. I can wear a 2xl but I like the 3xl’s better. I’m just a little more comfortable. After wearing these sizes for so long, you have to take a while to get used to not buying them….Which brings me to the whole point of my story. (Finally!)
So, I was out shopping for a jacket, you know because we have real bad winters in Texas. I saw a jean jacket I liked, but noticed they only had one. I saw the size and thought, “I can fit into that”. So I tried it on. It fit. Then I thought, “of course I can fit into that, that’s the size I wore 100 lbs ago”. Obviously, the jacket was too big on me, but I left it on and went to the mirrors to look at it. I tried really hard to convince myself that since I had been this size before, then it certainly was okay to continue to buy clothes this size. This is a false statement. Just because I was once this size, doesn’t mean I’m still that size. I really tried to convince myself to buy it. Instead I ordered online with the correct size. I received it in the mail and it fits perfectly.